How to get a boyfriend/girlfriend

iamglennc0c0:

  • Go on wikihow.
  • Search how to summon the Dark Lord Satan.
  • Summon the Dark Lord Satan.
  • Give him your soul in exchange for a girlfriend and/or boyfriend.
  • If he says no, offer your hamster’s soul,
  • Satan likes hamsters because they are cute and fluffy.

Note: The fluffier the hamster, the better.

930 notes
kissmeok:

♡Love/Couples♡

crash-mcbarason:

to people that sleep with their bedroom doors open:you are brave but you are going to die young

(via xane-whorror)

27,633 notes

the-messy-brain-of-mine:

certifiedturtle:

alyssaannfrank:

lovelynobody00:

I wish i actually wore the fashion taste i have

I wish I could afford the fashion taste I have

I wish I had the body for the fashion taste I have

all of the above

(Source: bumbleshark, via midgetshakingtinyswordx3)

617,225 notes
  • King of France: and why the fuck would we send money and assistance to those resisting their sovereign??
  • Advisor: well it would be a big 'fuck you' to England
  • King of France: send funds to America
10,241 notes

twinkletwinkleyoulittlefuck:

cell-mate:

crackerhell:

ethanwearsprada:

i think it’s a universal truth that everyone in our generation takes pluto’s losing its planetary status as a personal offense

yes

pluto is smaller than russia. why did we ever even consider it a planet?

BECAUSE IT’S A PART OF OUR SOLAR SYSTEM

OHANA MEANS FAMILY

FAMILY MEANS NO ONE IS LEFT BEHIND

(via rinwolfy)

439,478 notes

clannyfenton:

in my english class we have to fill in this chart and say how many hours we’ve been on the computer or watching tv and say what we’re doing and why and my friend looked at me and said “you should probably lie a little.”

(via midgetshakingtinyswordx3)

229,947 notes

bvnvdict:

reblog this and i’ll handpaint your URL in victorian cursive

pls reblog ill cry

(via dontbeanassbutt)

2,201 notes

kosovan:

rufflesnotdiets:

deadcantdraw:

There’s over 300 languages spoken in London

Less than half of the population is white british

There are large areas with little to no white population

so if your show is set in London and has an all white cast you’re not even being remotely accurate

See Also: New York

los angeles is only 40% white yet look at every single tv show in LA :/ 

(via xane-whorror)

66,382 notes
simfected:

maythedownforcebewithyou:

myurlistoolong:

thefrogman:

A news station was interviewing a man who lived near a dangerous intersection. It is known for an inordinate number of car crashes.

HE JUST KIND OF STEPS BACK
“oh see there you go son”

BALLS OF NONCHALANT STEEL

“See, now this is the kinda shit I’m talking about”